Biography (Fiction)

Chapter 1 - The Ugly Virus...

..:: I remember where I was when the Ugly virus started ::..
I thought to myself while driving away in that rusty old 69 Buick rat-rod. Never knowing where I was going, or where I’d end up… I recall the memory of the day I last visited Fat Lou and heard that obscure noise being broadcast over the radio. Lou, was suspicious that these noises where part of a plan for Aliens to take over the World! Showing me what he refereed to as “Code Name: Cow”, Lou elaborated that that by using this special drum set & drummer, he could disrupt the alien radio broadcasts, saving the entire planet from a horrid demise. Fat Lou is definitely crazy, yet I couldn’t help but feel like I was being drowned by the sounds of the radio’s broadcast…

..:: And then they came for us ::..
Suddenly, a horde of Zombies breaks through the basement door of the rat infested box fort that Lou called a laboratory. Tearing Fat Lou apart bit by bit! Staring helplessly, all I could think of was “Man, he deserved it. Where the fuck is this drum set? Where the hell is this drummer?”. Before I could react, the Zombies starting coming for me. I barely escaped with my life that day. Perhaps sometime, you just have to let the drummer find you. Project Cow found me, along with a boomstick and a lot of attitude… We quickly ejected from the place.

..:: Cow and Riggz ::..
Some weeks have passed. We’re on our own to find this drum set, walking along a barren road. An evil looking rat rod Buick comes racing towards us, just as I get that creepy feeling again. The same one I felt at Fat Lou’s. “Where ya headed?” the woman screams over the roar of the exhaust as the car screeches to a smokey halt. Cow looks at her and replies; “We’re looking for this drum set… and”. The drivers expression changes and cuts the conversation with “Get in” as a rusted door swings open! “I have someone for you to meet”. Our mutual love for vintage cars, tiredness, and hunger, leads us to trust this woman. Yet, she seems to have an unspoken agenda for the likes of us…

..:: The 8th floor ::..
The evil rat-rod came to a screeching halt. The driver barked “8th floor” immediately peeling off, leaving us in the middle of a once vibrant Time Square, New York City. Standing in front of Premier Studios on 7th Ave, we could hear the roar of a now distant engine stirring all of the Zombies. We quickly found ourselves surrounded and defenseless with flesh eating New Yorkers. Just when it seemed the end was near, a man kicked open the lobby door and yelled “stand back gentlemen, I’ve got this”.

..:: He had a bass ::..
The man grabbed the bass from his back and began playing. The frequency’s that came out were making the Zombies head’s explode in all of the surrounding area! It was amazing. He pushed us into the lobby of the building, looked at us both, smiled and said “it’s on” as the elevator doors open and we shuffled inside. A glance at the name tag on his shirt said “Scags”. We where just happy to be safe.

..:: Tupac’s left nut! ::..
“You know, this is the elevator where Tupac lost his left nut!?” Scags exclaimed! Me and Cow looked at each other and began laughing as the elevator doors opened. Something we hadn’t done in a while. We where led down a hallway covered in Gold & Platinum records of once great artists. Many, from a time much before the airwaves where destroyed and manipulated by the Ugly Virus.

..:: The Wizard ::..
At the end of the hall we began hearing a familiar sound coming from the last door. It was THE drum set. The doors of a beautiful studio opened and standing before us was Kevin “The Wizard” Giegel. He greeted us with a smile and said “So you are the musicians we seek!”. We walked into his lab as the door came slamming shut behind us and a massive array of lights began blinking at random…

..:: Operation Fun ::..
Surrounded by Zombies, we labored endlessly day after day. Experimenting with the sounds that shall awaken the dead souls is no easy task. 11 experimental frequencies have now been created. Known as project name “Operation Fun” the Wizard warns, even if we have the right frequencies, broadcasting shall be difficult. The aliens powerful hold on all frequencies make penetration nearly impossible. Yet we all agree, something must be done. It’s our friends out there! Our families. Operation Fun must be heard.

Cow left this morning and left a letter behind with a small map. The note reads “I know how it can be done! Must find Steve!!! If I’m not back in two weeks, follow this map to the target location”.

..:: Who the fuck is Steve!? ::
2 weeks, and 1 day later… “Who the fuck is Steve?” is all I can think of. The included map shows an area in Pennsylvania. It’s now seemingly imperative that I go as Cow has not returned. The Wizard and Scags warned me, and reluctantly geared me up with what they could share. I’ve taken copies of our experiments… Let’s hope Project Cow is still alive… Who the fuck is Steve???

Take Away The Ugly - TATU#3
01 – Somethings Wrong With Angela // TATU#3 (2020)
  1. 01 – Somethings Wrong With Angela // TATU#3 (2020)